Examine Your Life
Question 49: How do I avoid rejection?

   Rabbi Schwartz :
We cannot avoid rejection. Sometimes, even our best friends, without intention, ignore us and trample on our feelings. And we are hurt! Our question then should be, how can we minimize this pain of rejection.

One important way is to remember that every hurt we suffer comes only from Hashem. That is, even though friends may reject us without intention, Hashem however, does it on purpose. Why? – For, each one of these twinges, great and small, nudges us into becoming better people. They push us to perform at higher levels and reach new achievements. Thus, we may use our every putdown as a staircase going up.

Still, one form of rejection, we should regard very seriously. This is our worry when we pray, “Do not cast us off from You; do not strip us of Your Divine inspiration.”  In this appeal, we beg that we should not lose our ability to learn Torah, do mitzvos and grow closer to Hashem. Not to say that Hashem ever rejects us, chas v’shalom. Rather, since at times, we show disregard and disrespect in serving Him, we face the fear that we will lose it all. For this we must pray, please, please, do not reject us.

The bottom line then, as always, is that how we live our lives depends on us. We have the power! We have the power to block all feelings of rejection, and we have the power to use our pain to climb ever-higher and ever-closer to the purpose of our lives.

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